Monday, March 24, 2008

The Basics of Getting Laid or How to Find the Girl of Your Dreams

Let's face it, pal.

Most men are more the scanning type than they are the scholarly type. And this includes you. Yeah, there's a reason you've been making regular trips to the library and it has little to do with checking out books. The real reason you're there is to check out a few looks--like the looks on that curvy librarian.

OK Einstein. You've impressed us with you ingenuity. Now impress Brandy by going up to her and thinking up something clever to say. What's that? You can walk the walk but you can't talk the talk? We see. Your feet have no problem carrying you to great lengths to be near the babes. It's your lips that suddenly become glued at the thought of actually talking to a woman.

Well there's good news. If you have a pulse, there still is time. With the help of some women, I'm going to give you all the advice you need to find the girl of your dreams.


Forget all that nonsense you've heard about defense winning championships. If you want to bring home your trophy you have to go on the offensive. Nothing worthwhile was ever attained by sitting back and waiting for something to happen.

Think about it. You are a major player in the game, but so is Debbie. There's a reason why she spends an hour in front of the mirror making sure her appearance looks edible. It's to entice you. Women try to look good so they can use it to their advantage. If you can keep in mind that women are trying to attract you too, half the battle is over. All you have to do now is bring that runner home from third.

"If a guy wants to talk to a girl and he's just afraid of being rejected, he should just take that chance," says Victoria, a 23-year-old graduate student with out-of-this-world looks. "Or else, he'll never know. He has to decide whether or not it's worth it to him."

I'm willing to bet a woman with out-of-this-world looks is well worth it.


OK you're psyched now. You didn't realize women were out there looking to get picked up. You thought only guys had one-track minds. Well, now it's time to put that one-track mind to work. Even if the only reason you want to meet Sally is so you can bury your buddy in her um...., you can't just blurt that out. Be cautious.

Women want to be won over. They have a certain public image to uphold. They can't be as open as men are with their desires due to the social ramifications. That's why your approach is very important. And using a line just won't cut it.

"A lot of guys go out of their way with all these types of pick up lines," says April. "They should just use a genuine comment. A compliment would probably grasp my attention better than anything else."

"You don't want something that sounds like a line." adds Victoria. "Just something that sounds sincere. Something just like, 'I saw you and wanted to come up and talk to you.'"

So what do we take from all of this? First, you should sound genuine in your approach. Make her believe there's something really special about her besides her curvy figure. So, be complimentary, but be sincere. Also ask her about herself. Women like to talk about themselves. And when they open up to you, they feel closer to you which is exactly what you want--to get as close as possible to her delicious body. Remember, she needs you as much as you want to knead her--but be polite, sincere, and complimentary in your approach.


We're not going to lie to you. Looks matter. You know it yourself. You're not after her for her mind. It's the same for women, but only to a certain extent. Yes, an attractive man catches a gal's eyes, but usually they get over that and look for something more.

Don't think so?

How many times have you witnessed Joe Average with a different knockout every other week? What secret does he possess that makes him desirable to the type of woman you want? Well, he's probably just himself. That's it. Himself. It can't be money. If a gal is really gorgeous, she can get any man she wants, right? Good looking guys have money, too.

His car? Please. See the above theory. Good looking guys have been known to drive nice cars. It comes down to Joe Average taking pride in himself and his appearance. Confidence in yourself is really appealing to women.

To help, make yourself more desirable. For starters, shower regularly. Brush your teeth. Get a decent haircut and use that exercise bike that's been collecting dust in your basement. And most importantly, remember to smile.

OK, you passed the test. You bathed, rehearsed your approach, and thought of something meaningful to say. After scouting out the girl with the sizzling legs for weeks, she has agreed to go out with you. Depending on how she feels about you, she may even decide to end up under the sheets with you.


Now you're going to need to know how to please her. Yes, you have to please her! You can just think of your needs. If you're good and you know what you are doing, she'll reward you with more sex. And that's what you want. When you're a good enough lover, she'll come back for more.

Yes, that gorgeous, beauty will want you all for herself.

A woman needs to feel her partner is sensitive to her needs and desires. So, you might have to spend some time learning about what she likes and dislikes. This is also the time to bring on the compliments about her body. Tell her how much you love it and how much it turns you on. Telling her how voluptuous a bod she has will help her get rid of any inhibitions and will lead to more pleasure for both of you.

And then work over every inch of her body. Keep in mind you're doing it for her and not for yourself. Your goal should be to get her so excited that she will be ready and willing for you when the time comes to take that plunge. If you take enough time to do right by her, she's going to be as excited for it as you are.

Now get to work boys and good luck.

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